Discontent is born out of longing. We all have longings and desires. The question I have to ask myself (and try to answer honestly) is, “Is this a godly longing or and ungodly one?” After all, we can long for things that God wants to give. He just doesn’t always answer in the way we expect.

For example, I have a friend who, when she was evaluating her Christlikeness at the beginning of a new year, “decided” her prayer for the year would be for God to grant her humility. (I know, she’s brave!) Wouldn’t you say that her longing was godly? In line with God’s will for his children? So, that year, life as she knew it completely changed. God altered her circumstances so much that she was forced to accept help from others, something she was not accustomed to doing. She has worked harder and learned to die to self over and over again the past few years. I believe God is in the process of answering her prayer, but I don’t think her longing was for her circumstances to change like they did. Humility isn’t the only thing she’s learning. I think she’s learning to be content in all things, too.

On the flip-side, we can have ungodly longings. For example, it seems I have this bad habit of setting people up to be my heroes. I decide I like the way someone else does something or I like a particular attribute, and so I want to copy that and be like that person. I also have a longing to be a leader, which isn’t a bad thing if the motives are right. Since my heart is deceitful above all things (I don’t care WHAT John Eldredge writes) I can fool myself into thinking my motives are good and godly, but only God can discern the thoughts and intents of the heart. My prayers centered on having others “see” me a certain way. One day, I was asked if I’d like to lead a very important ministry at church. Do I have to tell you how badly I wanted it? And for all the wrong reasons. I accepted. And for the next two years I was miserable. No one “saw” me the way I wanted them to. Everything was wrong. God gave me what I thought I wanted, and I learned to be content (and much happier) serving in the background.

We are going to have longings. So, when I feel discontent rising up in me, I have to be brave enough to ask myself some very specific questions so that I get to the heart of the issue. “Where is this longing coming from? Do I really want this?” Hughes adds some more piercing questions:

When you find yourself discontented, stop and make a calculated evaluation of the longing. Is it a godly one–or ungodly? Will you yield to temptation in an attempt to satisfy your heart’s desire, or will you turn to God and His Word for help?” (Disciplines of a Godly Woman, p.83).

Whatever the longing is, I need to ask, “What am I willing to sacrifice on its altar? Am I willing to dive headfirst into sin to get what I want?” Our desires offer us an opportunity to sin OR depend on Christ. As Paul said he learned, “I can do all things through Him who stengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13) We will not know the reality of this if we do not put our hope in God.

John Piper has some wonderful things to say about contentment as it relates to godliness and the desire for financial gain. Honestly, I’ve been using the word discontent because it sounds much less evil than covetousness. Piper defines covetousness this way: “Covetousness is desiring something so much that you lose your contentment in God. The opposite of covetousness is contentment in God.” I am not qualified to lecture on fighting against the longing for more money, as I battle this one every two weeks. And I have no real needs! I’ve listened to this one twice. It’s piercing. Listen or read the sermon here.