I listened to talk radio again this morning as I drove the kids to swimming lessons. Last Monday, I heard something crazy about Adam & Eve. Well, today the topic was fireworks. The men called a representative from Crazy Bills to set the record straight about shooting fireworks this Fourth of July holiday.

Someone has spread a nasty rumor all over the Southeast that our Independence Day celebration had to be fireworks-free due to the lack of rainfall this summer unless one was shooting over a body of water.

I heard of a couple of people who bought blow-up pools to shoot their fireworks over. And one woman called the radio station to say she would be shooting hers over the birdbath. Somehow I don’t think the Fire Marshall would consider those “bodies of water.”

Not to worry because the Crazy Bills rep. explained that it was just one of those rumors that spreads like wildfire(!). There’s no tellin’ where it came from.

“We have removed the banned fireworks from the shelves and if you can buy it in our store, then you can shoot it.”

She then went on to explain that Crazy Bills does business year-round. Yessir! They fill orders for birthdays, weddings, and even funerals.

“You can send us the ashes of your loved one and we can special-make the fireworks for a funeral. Just send the ashes to China, we place them in the egg, and make the explosive. You can even request the design you want your fireworks to be…we can turn you into a giant burning smiley face if you want.”

I’m considering a new post category: Heard on the Morning Show.