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(Zero) Truth in Advertising
Noah, observing all the scrubbing and grunting associated with cleaning the bathtub, said, “Wow, that stuff works WAAAAY better on the commercials. All they do is spray and wipe it clean.”
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Learning is fun{ny}
Abbey: Guess what is the hardest part of my body? Me: Ummm, your head! Abbey: Nope. I know something you don’t know! Me: Well, tell me. What’s the hardest part of the body? Abbey: My enormal; it’s even harder than my booooonesssss. Me: Your what? Abbey: My enormal! Me: I think you mean enamel, Sweetie.…
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I hate the Easter Bunny (and Santa Claus)
“Tell him there IS an Easter Bunny!” “Mrs. Leslie,” he challenged, “isn’t that right? There’s not a real Easter Bunny. Tell her.” Not wanting her to cry, he turned back to her and said, “Well, ok, the Easter Bunny is bunny AND your mom and dad. They work together.” “Tell her,” he demanded. “He’s not…
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Like Mother Like Daughter
It always happened at night. From the time I was about 7 or 8 I would lie in bed and think about dying. I obsessed about the death of my grandmother, who, by the way, is still kicking in her 80’s. If I wasn’t thinking about my grandmother, then I was tallying my deeds. How…
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The Last Enemy
We were leaving our bedrooms at the same time. Abbey came running into the hallway and ran right into my legs and grabbed hold of me. “What’s the matter, Sweetie Pie?” I asked. I had to ask a few more times before she found her voice. “I don’t want you to die,” Abbey answered through…
Leslie Wiggins 